Second Story Syndrome

Howdy All.

I hope everyone is well.  We’re a month into 2018 and things are crazy!

This is just going to be a quick update about me…exciting I know, and then I’ll follow up in a couple weeks with more interesting fare.

I received my novella back from the editor and it turns out it’s just a complete mess.  I’ll admit I was less than focused last year, but that’s really no excuse.  I haven’t put out a novel in almost 3 years and I was truly hoping to get something out this month.

Evidently it’s not too uncommon to have your second novel suck balls so I’m not completely devastated. However, I am just devastated enough to hunker down and really focus so I can truly deliver something that will in fact not suck.

I take solace in knowing many writers suffer from “Second Story Syndrome” I just figured because of my years of experience I wouldn’t.

No one wants to hear their second attempt is a steaming pile of terribles, but it is what it is and she’s right…it is.  I do love the premise and potential so I will eventually go back and fix it, but my editor has almost 20 years experience so I’m taking her advice and leaving it aside for now.

I will now, be concentrating on my next two novels, Blood Rebellious and Night Mage that I will be aiming to release later this year and early next.

This will be followed by the sequel to The Geek entitled STILLWATER. And then, after the fixing I’ll release my novella.

Or I won’t.  We’ll see.

I will however be doing less podcasts and YouTube because I simply must concentrate on writing. If I’m not focused it’s all gonna suck and it is what I love to do more than anything.

Not suck, I don’t love that, I mean writing.

I am going to be taking this week to go over the chapters I’ve written so far for each novel and then choose the one I feel confident I’ll be able to flow with over the next month/month and half and finish it in time for a late spring/early summer release.

So while it’s unfortunate about the podcast and the youtube channel I will be uploading, but very sporadically.  And I’ll let you all know when new episodes are up.

However we currently do have a new podcast up on Podbean and ITunes all about time travel and the John Titor story.  I’ve also uploaded the video version of the podcast on YouTube, also about John Titor.

All links are below.

I hope everyone is getting their 2018 off to a good start and I’ll see you all very soon.

Best,

Jonathan

Perilous Podcast http://bit.ly/2och5LE  John Titor, Time Traveling Sex Maniac.

Perilous Vlogcast  http://bit.ly/perilpod Same guy, same sex mania.

Instagram http://bit.ly/1XgDJfc Stupid pictures I post of me doing stupid life stuff.

Twitter http://bit.ly/1YIWqZA A place to troll and be trolled.

Facebook http://bit.ly/fnbrjwp Probably pictures of me getting beaten up.

Goodreads http://bit.ly/1XpMF4k Read my reviews before you buy my novel.

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Hey look at me not giving a fuck.

Amazon http://amzn.to/1MwzPG6 Buy my novel already!  Jeez!

If you’re in Los Angeles head on over to Skylight Books in Los Feliz and pick up a copy there. They’re a great independent bookstore and it’s a nice way to show support for them.  We need all the independent stores we can get.

Well I don’t know about you but…

…I’m freaking exhausted.

I’ve written and re-written this entry about five times now.  The whole post was going to be discussing the current state of the right and the left, the hypocrisy on both sides by the accused and those who support them as well as delving deep into this whole insane sexual predator/assaulter tornado of shit we find ourselves in.

However, things are moving so freaking fast and crazy it’s frankly nearly impossible to keep up.

And then you check facebook…that’s a terrible idea.  Because everyone is mad about everything ever in the world, about things they should be angry about, things they shouldn’t be angry about and quite frankly just looking for new things to be angry about.

I am slowly putting a long series together and will wait until this whole thing calms down a bit to post it.  I’m doing this for a number of reasons, A) because there’s so much going on I want to wait for the fallout to see where we all stand.  For example, the whole Roy Moore shit show and to see how many more women come out from the shadows to talk about Al Franken.

B) Maybe this can be a place for people to come and just chill as we get into the holidays.  There are so many voices shouting to the sky and into the abyss of the internet that it’s just way too much sometimes and I think we could all use a little break.

So until after the new year, this will be a place where there are no politics, social commentary or anything like that. Though podcast and YouTube will not be included in that ban.

In other words…

…Fuck it, here’s a story about a Tree.

Conversations with nature: The Pink Tree

As I strolled down the lane, sunlight dappling through the clouds I was struck by the beauty of the tree.  I stopped short, breathed deep and just stared in awe at nature’s exquisite palette.

The tree stood silent, noble and proud.  I closed my eyes, reaching out with my mind for contact, my thoughts forming words.

To my surprise, the tree responded.

Hey Pink Tree. Watcha thinkin’ about? I asked.

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Nothin’ just Pink Tree stuff. It whispered in my mind.

Cool bruh.

What’d you just say to me?!

Um…cool…bruh?

I ain’t your bruh!

Whoa Pink Tree chill!

Don’t tell me to chill you little shit!

Damn Pink Tree what’s your problem?

I don’t have to explain myself to you! Fuck off human!

Whatever Pink Tree…just…whatever.

And thus ends our first installment in the conversations with nature series. More next week.

As for the podcast, nothing new up this week though Angie and I will be recording a number of them this weekend. However you can still listen to the Illuminati podcast and of course watch the video on YouTube.

Though there is a new video up on youtube today about the RFK assassination and MK Ultra. We recorded it this past summer and it has been available on podbean and iTunes for months but never got around to posting it on youtube until now.

Okay, back next week.

Hang in there everybody.

Instagram http://bit.ly/1XgDJfc Stupid pictures I post of me doing stupid life stuff.

Goodreads http://bit.ly/1XpMF4k Read my reviews before you buy my novel.

Amazon http://amzn.to/1MwzPG6 Buy my novel already!  Jeez!

20150926_151118

Hey look at me not giving a fuck.

Twitter http://bit.ly/1YIWqZA I say stupid stuff in small snippets.

Perilous Podcast http://bit.ly/2och5LE  Current episode is about the Illuminati

Facebook http://bit.ly/fnbrjwp Probably pictures of me getting beaten up.

Perilous Vlogcast  http://bit.ly/perilpod It’s the video version of the Podcast. This week RFK and MKULTRA.

 

 

 

 

I’m ready to admit I can’t do this alone.

Hey all,

Thanks for stopping by the mothership.  I hope everyone had an awesome week and has some fun stuff planned for this weekend.

This week it’s all about putting ego aside and admitting when you need help.  I think we’ve all been here before.  We start something and think I can handle this.  I can do this on my own. And honestly nine times out of ten we can.

However, there are times when perhaps our pride, or even our delusional nature of being stronger than we are can get in the way and before long, instead of asking for help we find ourselves in way over our head.

I think perhaps I’m getting to that point and I’m going to put ego aside and ask for help.

The short of it is, that for the past couple of months I’ve been doing my darnedest to get blocked by the President of the United States on twitter.  When I heard he’d blocked people I thought Now there’s something I could hang my hat on.

However, it doesn’t seem to be working.  I’ve created memes, I’ve been condescending, borderline offensive and have gone full on ridicule at times.  I’ve been ending my tweets with #tinyhands #sad #adulterer #lowiq and many others.

I’ve even created a whole series of tweets and memes called Kim Jong Don.

Nothing seems to be working, so I guess it’s time to ask for help.

I’m not asking you to follow me, I’m simply asking that if you have a twitter account, if you see one of my tweets that you find particularly funny then just give it a re-tweet.  Maybe, through cooperation we can get me blocked by the most powerful man in the world.

I do not plan on filing a law suit, like some who have been blocked.  It would simply be a badge of pride for me and honestly as the year draws to a close, a really great way to end 2017.

Now if you are a conservative and voted for President Trump that’s fine and I encourage you to get on board this as well.  Because if I’m blocked by him people won’t see my tweets so you can count that as a victory.

Also, I don’t want to hear that I’m disrespecting the President.  I have not once, tweeted at or replied to any tweets under the official POTUS twitter account.  That would be disrespectful to the office and I would never do that.  And honestly if President Trump only tweeted under the POTUS account I wouldn’t engage.

But he and his staff have made it very clear that even though he is the President; when he tweets under his personal account he’s simply tweeting as a citizen.

That makes it fair game in my book.  I would never disrespect the office of the President, but constitutionally speaking I’m totally within my rights to belittle the man.

So you see I’m not trying to divide us or pick a fight with my conservative friends, I’m trying to bring us all together under the banner of free speech.

‘MERICA!

Seriously I’ve put a lot of work into this and I think I just need a little help.  So if you’re willing, if you’re ready to help a fellow American, I would appreciate it.  But hey, if not that’s cool too.

But I think it would be awesome if I logged onto twitter one morning and found I’d been blocked by President Trump.

I’ve created a bunch of memes, some I’m more proud of than others and I’m going to post some here for you to use if you’d like.  So you get some cool free prizes today too.

Here’s one I’m pretty proud of:

dosxx

 

I’m also pretty proud of these:

1xdh5r

 

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I’m not above using the Federation or House Stark either:

picard

mueller

And finally two from my Kim Jong Don series that I’m pretty proud of:

kimjong2

 

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So there you go everybody.  It’s time to come together as Americans and get me blocked by Donald Trump on twitter.  If you love America, if you love freedom, if you believe in trolling as therapy then you cannot deny this call to action!

Or don’t, seriously it’s not that big of deal.

Over on the Perilous Podcast we’re talking about some lingering questions around 9/11.  Up on YouTube it’s our super, secret, Dulce Base Alien War episode.

YAY!

Have a great weekend and I’ll see ya next Friday.

Links below:

Instagram http://bit.ly/1XgDJfc Stupid pictures I post of me doing stupid life stuff.

Goodreads http://bit.ly/1XpMF4k Read my reviews before you buy my novel.

20150926_151118

Hey look at me not giving a fuck.

Amazon http://amzn.to/1MwzPG6 Buy my novel already!  Jeez!

Twitter http://bit.ly/1YIWqZA I say stupid stuff in small snippets.

Perilous Podcast http://bit.ly/2och5LE  Current episode is about 9/11

Facebook http://bit.ly/fnbrjwp Probably pictures of me getting beaten up.

Perilous Vlogcast  http://bit.ly/perilpod It’s the video version of the Podcast. This week Dulce Base!

Sobriety and BJJ. It’s a game changer.

Hey all,

Happy Monday!  There’s actually going to be a ton of pics in this post for a change so that’s fun right?!

Recently I had an odd one year anniversary.  Odd in the sense that one does not usually celebrate an anniversary of this nature, but I’m going to.

Just over a year ago I left my regular gym and joined a MMA gym.  No I am not suffering from delusions of grandeur and have no plans to go pro.  In fact I make it very clear that the pros who go to our gym are training there.

Me, I’m taking classes.

See the difference?

Anyhoo, when I first started I was doing combat conditioning along with Krav Maga and it was great.

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We take Combat Conditioning very seriously at Gabe’s gym.

However, while I enjoyed Krav I wasn’t getting as much out of it as I had hoped.

Like all kids from the valley I did Tae Kwon Do and later Tang Soo Do, when I was growing up.

I boxed in high school and studied Karate when I lived in Japan.

Not to say I was a badass or anything, but they were fun and I enjoyed them all.

However, I didn’t seem to be learning anything in Krav Maga that I hadn’t learned before.  I was just learning it in a new way.

Then about six months ago I got tricked (yeah that’s right tricked!) into trying the no-gi Brazilian Jiu Jitsu class, and that was a real game changer for me.

I instantly realized two incredibly important things.

  1. Brazilian Jiu Jitsu is the perfect martial art for a sober person.
  2. I suck at Brazilian Jiu Jitsu.
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This is Sandy. She’s very sweet and one of the fitness instructors at the gym. She’s also incredibly terrifying.

BJJ is completely different than anything I’ve ever done before, and as a sober person it has absolutely changed my life.

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I honestly don’t know why I’m smiling in this picture, I was frickin’ exhausted.

It’s hard to describe and possibly hard to understand, but alcoholics wrestle with a lot of cognitive dissonance in the sense that we tend to be filled with a lot of self destruction and self loathing and at the same time incredibly over inflated egos.

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Me annoying Sha, who does administrative stuff at the gym and as usual Sha very patiently putting up with my shenanigans and bullshit.

Sobriety and ego don’t tend to go hand in hand.  And keeping your ego stripped is incredibly important.  And let me tell you something, nothing keeps your ego in check like BJJ.

If you go in with ego you’re doomed.  You need to leave that shit at the door man.  Also, nothing keeps you humble like having the shit choked out of you by a 12 year old girl.

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Not in this picture, the evil little 12 year old girl who keeps beating me up.

In my defense, she’s really good.

There’s an odd mindset in BJJ that I compare to skydiving.  If you’ve never been skydiving, A) you should and B) there’s a strange thing that happens in the jump plane as you take off and head to 15,000 feet.

Everybody sort of looks around the plane and there’s this silent conversation that goes something like Oh, you’re an idiot too and about to do something pretty dangerous and foolhardy?  Cool.

That’s the basic attitude I’ve found in the brotherhood/sisterhood of BJJ.  Because quite frankly, BJJ is a really bad idea.  It’s an insane way to spend your time and if you do BJJ you’re going to get hurt.  It’s inevitable.

My first class I bruised my ribs.  Since my first class I’ve bruised them again on both sides, sprained my wrist, broke my pinky toe (it healed sideways and I’m pretty proud of that), torqued my knee, pulled a calf muscle and am generally in constant, dull pain.

You will never hear from a practitioner of BJJ “It gets better”, in relation to the pain.  The only thing you hear is “You get used to it”.  And the great thing is, you actually do. Which is a plus.  I think.

BJJ is truly a journey with no end, which means for the next 30 years or so I’ll be learning and having my ego kept in check which is great for a guy like me.

But when it comes to BJJ and the school it really boils down to the guy running it.  I thought all gyms were like the one I go to, but I’ve heard horror stories from guys who go to our school about other schools, where things are not as chill.

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Class time is serious time, picture time is fun time. This was the day I bruised my ribs for the third time so I wasn’t smiling but I was still happy.

I say “chill” to mean that there are absolutely no attitudes at our school.  And that all comes from the top.  Even the pros who train there are really patient and gracious.

We have some great professors and coaches at the school, but everything stems from Gabe Ruediger, the owner.  He’s never come right out and said it, but I really think Gabe would rather not have the money than have an asshole at the gym.

Supposedly this is pretty rare, so I am incredibly lucky.

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The day Professor Ruediger gave me my first stripe. Probably not gonna get another one of these for a looong time so I really savored the moment.

But our school is more than just a school really.  I’ve become good friends with some of the guys there and we all hang out…a lot.  This may sound hokey, but it’s tough making friends the older you get, so for a guy like me, it’s been a really nice experience.

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Grabbing some lunch at our favorite all you can eat vegan restaurant.

Gabe is also one of those guys that actually cares about his students and really works hard to foster a community.

I was incredibly busy a couple weeks ago and wasn’t able to get to the gym for class.  I was only out for a week, but that Friday, I got a text from Gabe just checking in to see if I was okay.

Who does that?!?!

Now, it’s not like I’m his favorite or anything he checks in with most students if they disappear for any length of time, and that is all down to his character and again that permeates the school.

Instead of just charging your card once a month he really makes it clear that he wants you to get better and that you’re a part of the community.

For a guy like me, that’s pretty much everything.  It’s more important than AA.  More helpful than a sponsor.  It is the place that I feel welcomed and inspired.

Even though I’m the worst student there.  Seriously that’s not me being self deprecating or shitting on myself, that’s fucking science.

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Paintball in the day, Professor’s Bday party in the night.

But, I have a breakthrough at least once a week when in class and I suck a little less each time.

The training keeps me focused, the rolling (sparring) keeps me humble and my fellow students keep my ego in check.

By beating and choking the ever loving shit out of me.

No person can do sobriety the way another person does.  Each person has their own path to walk, their own journey.

For me, the new journey on my path is BJJ.

You have to face a lot of fears when doing BJJ and that’s a good thing too:

The fear of injury (you’ll get used to it).

The fear of inadequacy (you’ll overcome it).

The fear of humiliation (humility comes from the loss of ego).

The fear of being claustrophobically smothered with someone’s nuts on your face (gonna be honest here, you’re probably not gonna get over the Arabian Goggles but you’ll work through the claustrophobia).

Plus the workout is damn incredible.  I’m in the best shape I’ve been in, in about 25 years.

Give it a shot, you may suck at it, but you’ll suck less the more you do it and it will keep you humble, keep you focused and could very well help keep you sober.

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Just a reminder that my band Three Penis Death Punch. We’ll be at the Pickle Box in Austin on November 5th so come check us out.

And if you’re really lucky you’ll end up at a place like my school where it’s more than just professors and students.  It’s a real community.

Have a great week everybody and I’ll see you all Friday.  Friday I’m gonna start a series of micro-stories and poetry posts, so that should be really pretentious.  Yay!

Instagram http://bit.ly/1XgDJfc Stupid pictures I post of me doing stupid life stuff.

Goodreads http://bit.ly/1XpMF4k Read my reviews before you buy my novel.

haka

A new day a new challenge, got to work on my posing though.

Amazon http://amzn.to/1MwzPG6 Buy my novel already!  Jeez!

Twitter http://bit.ly/1YIWqZA I say stupid stuff in small snippets.

Perilous Podcast http://bit.ly/2och5LE  Current episode is about The Philadelphia Experiment.

Facebook http://bit.ly/fnbrjwp Probably pictures of me getting beaten up.

Perilous Vlogcast  http://bit.ly/perilpod It’s the video version of the Podcast.

Sobriety is Great! And It Sucks Balls!

Hi there, how are you?  Welcome back and I hope everyone is surviving the week.

So this is going to be a 3 part series of blog posts to get off my chest things that are, well, on my chest.

Don’t worry, it’s not about the current political climate I guess we’re all sick of that, though now more than ever we must be paying attention to what is going on around us.  But again, I’m not going to get into that here…today or for the next week or so.

I have a couple of anniversaries coming up that are pretty important to me.  One of which I will celebrate on Friday and the following Wednesday.

Today though I’m going to bore the ever loving fuck out of you with my tale of continued sobriety and my ever constant failed attempts at “adulting”.

Though I suppose I shouldn’t say failed, because that would be too harsh, however I do feel that I have somehow failed, but this has more to do with my own insecurities and bouts of self-destruction.

Unfortunately I can’t really go into detail too much.  I mean, I suppose I could but I’m trying to protect someone I care about…still care about.  Though at times I wonder if they actually deserve it.

It’s hard for most people to understand the mind of a degenerate alcoholic.  Especially if that alcoholic looks and acts like I do.  I tend to be a bit of a goofball and am usually in a good mood.

However, this also stems from decades of using humor as a shield or a way to deflect from feeling a true deep emotion.

But, and there’s no way to say this without sounding cocky, I am actually pretty damn funny.  That’s not an assumption, that’s fact based on rigorous research.  And I do get much joy out of making others laugh or in some way brightening their day.

A spoonful of sugar and all that.

But, what happens most of the time is that people think everything is always okay, but most of the time, if I’m not really on top of it, my mind is basically trying to kill me.

When I was drinking, my mind found many ways to lead me down the besotted path.  Drinking and the liberal use of other substances, coupled with my ability to deflect with humor usually kept me in a numb, very shallow (emotionally) state.  This is great for an alcoholic as it allows you to go through life not really giving a fuck.

Not giving a fuck about work.  Not giving a fuck about yourself.  Not giving a fuck about life.  Not giving a fuck about love.  Really just not giving a fuck about anything other than the real basic needs.

The need to eat.  The need to sleep.  The need to drink.  The need to fuck everyone stupid enough to let you into their bed.

It’s not a healthy way to live, but it’s good if you don’t want to feel.

A relationship ends?  So what.

Someone hurts you?  Hurt them back out of “honor” and then move on with your life.

You abandoned a friend when they needed you?  So what, it’s their fault for being stupid enough to think you’d help.  They really should’ve figured you out by now.

My last drink was on December 23, 2013.  Since then I’ve been doing a lot of work on myself to keep the self destruction at bay.

There are advantages to being sober of course.  Not waking up in a panic.  Not having to piece your night together through the trail of the receipts you find in your pocket.  Not feeling the need to run downstairs and check your car for dings, dents, blood or dead hookers in the trunk.

These are all positives.  But there are also positives that can be negatives too.

I do have days where I miss not giving a shit.  Where I could flit from relationship to relationship or hook up to hook up and not care, simply because I was numb.

However, for the most part, the ability to feel, to really feel, outweighs the negatives.

There really were no highs before I got sober.  There was just the appearance of it, the faking happy, the faking fun, the faking anything and everything to keep people away.

My mind was an absolute shit show.  The thoughts that ran through it were a daily parade of self loathing, clever ideas about death, supreme inadequacy and even darker shit that was a glorious mélange of bullets, knives, blood, general fuckery, anger, hate (at myself and everyone else) and the occasional full blown fantasy of the entire world going up in smoke.

Now though, I do feel.  I mean truly feel.  The highs, the good days, the good times are epic.  However, the lows, the lows can really get you.

I had a run in yesterday with someone who I feel I helped through an incredibly serious time in their life.  I let all my guards down, I put aside my needs and wants for the most part and tried – and I think succeeded – in making the selfless choices over feeding my own needs and desires.

Again, not getting into too much detail, but quite frankly I don’t know where this person would be right now if it weren’t for me.  And of course part of me feels like a total shit for even thinking that thought.  But it is what it is.  I wont apologize for still being human and wanting to be acknowledged for putting someone else’s needs to the point of my own hurt, above my own.

I don’t really know if that’s petty.  It’s hard to say, since this is still kind of new for me.

So, this person has really turned their life around recently and I’m so grateful for that.  They deserve to be happy and I truly want that for them.

But, this run in I had on the phone with them made me feel like an absolute fool.  Like I meant nothing to them, that what I did for them didn’t matter.  I was faced with the realization that if they had to choose between making a sacrifice to help me or leave me to wallow in darkness, they would choose darkness.  Which I doubt is true, but it’s how it felt.

I certainly hope it’s not the choice they’d make.  That would really piss me the fuck off.

I don’t think this person wanted to make me feel like shit on purpose, I really don’t.  But, I feel how I feel and I won’t deny it.

So this sent me into a tailspin of shit.  Of not being able to work, of being heart sick and really wanting to drink.

But, then I told myself what I’ve been telling myself for the past 3 1/2 plus years.  Nobody forced you to do this.  You made your choice to help.  You have to embrace the fact that you were able to do this because you were sober and because you are sober you’re going to feel things.  So dipshit, do you want to feel or do you want to be numb?

I made the same choice I’ve been making.  I choose to feel.  So I took the day and readjusted myself.  I meditated for a good two hours (more of that on the next post), had a nice light lunch and then went to the gym.

Of course, through the rest of the night every time the phone rang or the text buzzer went off I thought It’s them!  They do care and they’re reaching out to let me know they’re sorry.

But it was never them.  Now, I say all this knowing full well the basic tenet of our society is that being self centered is wrong.  However, most people are benignly self centered.  Every single one of us lives in our own solar system that we share with many other solar systems in the galaxy of life.

We are the sun, the center of our solar system, the world always revolves around us.

Another thing most people don’t want to admit is that pretty much every alcoholic or drug addict (or both if you’re a multitasker) is a frickin’ narcissist.

It’s my world, my solar system, my pain, my loss.  Etc.

So I sat there a little butt hurt that this person didn’t realize they’d left me in pain, that the tone of my voice when we spoke didn’t come through or they didn’t pick up to the fact that I was not actually fine.

This is no ones fault but my own.  Look folks if you don’t communicate your feelings you can’t expect the person you’re talking to, to pull an Indiana Jones and decipher the hieroglyphics of your soul.

Communicating true feelings still make me very uncomfortable and it’s something I have to work on, I know this and quite frankly it’s not the other person’s fault I let it drop when I really wanted to keep talking at the expense of their own personal comfort.

So it’s not on them, it’s on me.

However, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t hurt, or that this person’s inability to put my feelings first didn’t sting.  But it is what it is and even though I may be wrong, I continue to believe that this person is truly good and did not mean to hurt me.

But it still pissed me right the fuck off.

So what’s the point of all this?  Well, if you’re not an alcoholic, I suppose the point of this post was just to bitch and get some shit off my chest.

However, if you are an alcoholic and you want to stop I can tell you that sobriety is pretty damn spectacular.  You will face challenges, you will face urges and the occasional shit storm.  However, being brave enough to walk away from the self destructive numb, you will experience life, I mean truly experience it.  You’ll get all the best highs and all the worst lows.

But you will feel.

If you’re in recovery, just remember, no one is worth your sobriety.  Your mind is going to constantly try to kill you and you’re never going to be perfect. And it’s going to be the little thing that really tempts you.  It’s not going to be the death of a loved one, or losing your job.  It’s not going to be that heart wrenching break up or the argument with a family member.

The thing that will tempt you the most will be the tiniest thing.  It’ll be something insignificant that blows up inside your mind like a seemingly insensitive text or phone call.

But remember two things:

  1. No one is perfect, humans are flawed and if you want to live amongst the normals you have to cut them and yourself a lot of slack.
  2. No one, no one at all, is worth your sobriety or sanity.

Okay so that was pretty whiney and cuntish, but that’s the mood I was in and sometimes this blog isn’t about entertaining, hawking my wares or even shenanigans.  Sometimes it’s really about me and my need to clear the bad shit out of my mind so I can let the good stuff in.

You wanna bitch, then start your own blog.  On Friday I’ll be changing to a much more positive tone to discuss the value of meditation in sobriety and why connecting with your spirituality is key.

But look, let’s go ahead and cleanse the palette from all this seriousness.  Here’s a random dick pick for ya:richard-nixon-9424076-1-402

There, isn’t that better.

Now, here are some links to crap.

Instagram http://bit.ly/1XgDJfc Stupid pictures I post of me doing stupid life stuff.

Goodreads http://bit.ly/1XpMF4k Read my reviews before you buy my novel.

20150926_151118

Hey look at me not giving a fuck.

Amazon http://amzn.to/1MwzPG6 Buy my novel already!  Jeez!

Twitter http://bit.ly/1YIWqZA I say stupid stuff in small snippets.

Perilous Podcast http://bit.ly/2och5LE  Current episode is about Charlottesville.

Facebook http://bit.ly/fnbrjwp Probably pictures of me getting beaten up.

Perilous Vlogcast  http://bit.ly/perilpod It’s the video version of the Podcast.

Oh and if you’re in Los Angeles, The Geek is available at Skylight books in Los Feliz.

Okay let’s take a breath…

Hey All,

So I think we can all agree it’s been a hell of a week.  I’m not going to get into what the President said or who’s right or who’s wrong here.

However, I do think a general metric in how you live your day to day life can be summed up as followed:

If the former head of the KKK thanks you for something you’ve said, you’ve said something horrible.  Unless you happen to be the current head of the KKK, in which case…well done ya ignorant, racist bastard.

Angie and I are actually going to be preempting our usual podcast this next Friday and will be airing an “emergency episode” of The Perilous Podcast this Wednesday in which we cover the current shit tsunami and dig deep into the conspiracy behind the alt-right, the far left and what really happened in Charlottesville and why you should actually be way more scared than you already are.

However, in the meantime how’s about a nice way to start your weekend.

Over on The Perilous Podcast site I sit down with Bryant Dillon, co-founder of Fanbase press and fellow writer.  We talk about how comic book super heroes are becoming the new pantheon of Gods and it’s far more light hearted and fun than what’s going on now.

On The Perilous Podcast YouTube channel we have the video broadcast of our Black Dahlia podcast from last week, plus other past episodes in video form.  So you may want to give that a watch.

As for me I’m getting ready to do a bit of traveling.  I’ll be in Denver (I think) in late September for a couple days, followed by a trip to Phoenix in late October and then a jaunt down to Palm Springs in early November, so yay me and my hotel points program.

I’m pretty excited about my novella coming out in January and my new novel set for release in spring of 2018 as well as some other stuff in the works I just can’t talk about right now…but it’s all good.

Look everyone, let’s try to stay calm, maybe even distract ourselves a bit (ain’t nothin’ wrong with that) and enjoy our weekend.

I have a lovely weekend planned as I recoup from my latest Jiu Jitsu injury, including a Tchaikovsky concert this evening, a bit of work tomorrow recording some podcasts followed by a night in and then I’m hoping some video games Sunday followed by a movie before going back to training on Monday.

Plus I scored some great plums at Costco this week so that’s good.

Anyhoo, why not follow the links below for all of your distraction needs.  Pick up a copy of my pulp novel The Geek. or maybe just unplug from everything and go for a nice long hike.

But seriously, buy my book first, I don’t see why you wouldn’t.  Links for that are below.  However if you’re in the Los Angeles area or live in Los Angeles and like supporting independent bookstores why not head into Los Feliz and go to Skylight Books to pick up The Geek in paperback.

Skylight is awesome.  They support and promote local and indie authors and it’s a great place to pick up a book and browse.  I love their counterculture stuff and they have a great selection of quirky fiction.

Plus it’s right down the street from Fred 62.  A great diner with awesome milkshakes, so you can stop by there before or after your trip.

No I am not the owner of Fred 62…but I eat there frequently.

Here’s a link to skylight with their address and hours:

http://www.skylightbooks.com/search/site/jonathan%20latt

And one for Fred 62, because it’s tasty:

http://fred62.com/index.php

Have a great weekend everybody.

Best,

Jonathan

Instagram http://bit.ly/1XgDJfc Stupid pictures I post of me doing stupid life stuff.

Goodreads http://bit.ly/1XpMF4k Read my reviews before you buy my novel.

cropped-20151012_100243-e14448544605591.jpg

Amazon http://amzn.to/1MwzPG6 Buy my novel already!  Jeez!

Twitter http://bit.ly/1YIWqZA I say stupid stuff in small snippets.

Perilous Podcast http://bit.ly/2och5LE  Current episode is about Superheroes becoming our new gods.

Facebook http://bit.ly/fnbrjwp Probably pictures of me getting beaten up.

Perilous Vlogcast  http://bit.ly/perilpod It’s the video version of the Podcast.

Meet Your New Planetary Protection Officer.

Hey All,

I hope everyone had a good and productive week and that you have fun plans for the weekend.

So by now I’m sure most of you have heard of the Planetary Protection Officer position at NASA that is currently vacant.  If you’re unfamiliar with it, below is the link to USAJOBS which has the ad there and of course you can apply online if you meet the requirements…also spelled out in the ad.

Here’s the link:

https://www.usajobs.gov/GetJob/ViewDetails/474414000/

Of course when we hear a job title like “Planetary Protection Officer” that sounds really exciting and why wouldn’t it be.  I like to think I am a man of action and able to rise to the occasion so I followed the appropriate link and sent the following email to NASA and officially threw my hat into the ring for this exciting position.

I’m not trying to boast, but I really think I have a shot.

Below is the letter in full that I sent:

Dear Sir/Madam/Jedi/Starfleet Officer/Protocol Droid and/or Lizard Snake Man/Woman thing,

I am officially applying for the open position of Planetary Protection Officer. I feel I meet all the requirements and also bring some unique talents to the table that go above and beyond what you are looking for.

Firstly I do have a lot of engineering expertise. Not only am I a certified Level 30 Dungeon Master, I have created over 2000 dungeons and campaigns during my career and have drawn most of those on graph paper with both ruler and compass, in pen! That’s right Pen!

I have planned, organized and built most of the spaceships in the Star Wars Lego collection including the Millennium Falcon. Please bear in mind I am talking about the Millennium Falcon that is comprised of 5,195 pieces, not that amateur hour crap most people build.

Secondly in terms of planetary protection and space program planning expertise, I’ve got that covered in spades. I have played through the entire Mass Effect Series, Doom and am fluent and familiar with both Kerbal Space Program and the old Missile Command Game that a I play through my emulator. Also, let’s not forget the aforementioned 5,195 piece Millennium Falcon I built, on my own!

In regards to diplomacy I feel confident in saying that I am incredibly diplomatic and easy to get along with. I have negotiated various peace agreements amongst the members of my Dungeons and Dragons group, not only during campaign but out of campaign as well.

And if you think it’s easy getting a Dwarven Cleric and a half Orc Ranger to see eye to eye on the do’s and don’ts of dungeon exploration, then you give it a shot pal.

I do not have a degree in physical science, but I do have a degree in physical education.

Okay I didn’t graduate but I bet I can do more jumping jacks than you and I think that should go into my plus column.

I have also spent years watching youtube videos about aliens, ufos, tiny animals eating tiny burritos (that’s gonna come in handy trust me) and have even commanded my own starship in Star Trek Online. That is not a paid plug, but it’s a great game.

I am also fluent in Esperanto, Klingon and can get by in Spanish as long as I’m ordering a coke.

Now, I do think it would be fair to state what I think are my weaknesses. Should we come into actual contact with Aliens I think I’d be pretty good at handling that, though it might be a good idea to keep some adult diapers handy just in case. If they’re friendly we’d be good to go. However, any aliens bent on domination may present a problem. I am an avowed coward and honestly think I’d probably turn tail and betray humanity to our new overlords at the first sign of trouble, this would most likely happen after I put on a clean diaper.

I think that pretty much sums it up. I look forward to hearing back from you and serving my country, the planet and humanity.

Again, let’s not forget that whole 5,195 piece Millennium Falcon thing.

Klaatu Barada Nikto,

Jonathan Latt

www.jonathanlatt.com

I encourage everyone who is interested to apply for the job, but let’s be honest, I’ve probably got this sewn up at this point.

Anyhoodledoodle, on other fronts there’s a brand new podcast up today over on podbean and iTunes for The Perilous Podcast.  This week we’re talking about the infamous Black Dahlia murder.  It’s a bit sad, but very interesting.

Over on the YouTube channel we’re airing the video version of last week’s podcast all about the Men In Black.

All my organic, non gmo, locally sourced links are below.

I hope everyone has a great weekend and a productive week.  See y’all next Friday.

Best,

Jonathan Latt

Instagram http://bit.ly/1XgDJfc Stupid pictures I post of me doing stupid life stuff.

Goodreads http://bit.ly/1XpMF4k Read my reviews before you buy my novel.

cropped-20151012_100243-e14448544605591.jpg

Amazon http://amzn.to/1MwzPG6 Buy my novel already!  Jeez!

Twitter http://bit.ly/1YIWqZA I say stupid stuff in small snippets.

Perilous Podcast http://bit.ly/2och5LE  Current episode is about the Black Dahlia.

Facebook http://bit.ly/fnbrjwp Probably pictures of me getting beaten up.

Perilous Vlogcast  http://bit.ly/perilpod It’s the video version of the Podcast.